Month: October 2019

When was the last time you went to see a therapist, a counsellor, a psychologist, a psychiatrist, a life coach or a personal trainer etc?

Did you feel pumped, refreshed, energized afterwards? How often did you go back to see them again?

Well, these are just questions to set the tone for this post and hopefully get you in serious thinking mode.

We all need a bit help sometimes. There’s nothing wrong with it. But bear in mind when we reach out to professionals and ask for their guidance: Help is not unlimited.

Imagine the next appointment is still 1 or 2 months away:

• What would you do if you find yourself off track or “falling off the wagon”?
• What would be your fall-back plan when no one is there to hold your hands?
• Would you call your friends or family? What if they aren’t readily available for you?

Time to take it in your stride!

There’ll come a time when we turn to ourselves for help. It’s a time to put what we’ve learnt to the test. The knowledge and skills we’ve required all come down to this defining moment. To prove to ourselves that we can get back on our feet on our own. It’s a true testimony to many sessions you’ve attended leading up to this moment of self-reliance! 

Remember, we need to do our “homework” to avoid relapsing into the same old vicious circle. It’s our responsibility.

For me, I’ve adopted a useful technique below to help me steer clear of some trouble spots:

• Review how far you’ve become. Ask yourself, do you honestly want to go back to square one and start all over again?

If the answer is a firm No, I know I’ve made a progress, no matter how small it is.

No one can guarantee the road to recovery. How long will it take? As long as it takes! But before you know it, there’ll come a time when you call someone to cancel the next appointment…

A few years ago, I bumped into an old friend of mine while wandering around Art Gallery of New South Wales, near Sydney Botanical Gardens.

I’ve always loved coming here at lunch time. The airy space, decorated with brilliant art pieces in an ultra-sterile, aesthetic setting. I can’t think of a better place to run into someone than this.

It would’ve been more than 10 years since we last spoke.

We quickly moved to a nearby leather bench, sat down and started talking about life in general.

Contrary to the college environment where she worked as a receptionist in the counselling unit in the early 90’s, she’s become a full-time personal carer. It’s a well-paid job. The money is good. But most importantly, it’s job satisfaction. Can’t complain.

She seemed happy with her new career path, so I didn’t bother asking her why she made such a bold move.

And? Tell me more. What else is new? I asked.

What came as a real shock to me was when she revealed chilling details on someone’s living conditions.

For privacy reason, she withheld all personal information and only touched on the key points anonymously – a resident from one of most affluent suburbs in Sydney.

It was a bit confronting to hear it first-hand from her about someone who’d been imprisoned by their own fears, never left their own home for 10 long years.

Up to that point, I had to take a short break. I briefly peeked over the gallery’s entrance and noticed the beautiful sunshine and blue sky outside. It was so uplifting and inviting. So much so, it was incomprehensible to think that people affected by mental illness, could do such a thing to deprive of their own freedom and avoid going out altogether.

The aftermath of the story was so profound that it left me with a lingering thought that kept me wondering: What can I do in my own little way to make the community we live in a kinder place?

Perhaps we can all start with people around us.

Imagine, if we practice random acts of kindness today and apply them to five people closer to us. If each of these five people also reach out to another five people within their family or social circle, then that’s a five-fold increase in the number of people helped.

So, who are these five people in your life?