We’re all familiar with the saying: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Think about those moments when we were away from a lover, a family member, a close friend, for whatever reason we couldn’t be there with them, absence left an empty space inside us that no one else could fill.
Absence is a dirty word that comes with a negative connotation. For example, absence from work, from school, from family etc, it reminds us of those unpleasant memories in our lives. Contrary to absence, presence, on the other hand, has been highly praised. Is absence that unforgivable?
My niece was born on Valentine’s Day. She must’ve been destined for love. We were all overjoyed to have her as a first baby in the family.
We all know bonding is very important at the early stage of an infant’s life. As a first-time uncle, I certainly didn’t want to miss any opportunities to do just that. Being a notorious time-poor person, I even managed to lay out a weekly visit plan. Results so far? It all went smoothly until the second week. I hit a roadblock.
What happened? There’re times when things just don’t go according to plan. That’s life, isn’t it?
I caught a minor cold. Being unwell means I can’t go visiting her as often as I wanted to or I’d put her at risk. Pity I couldn’t be there to watch her grow from week to week, I had to be absent from her life for the time I wasn’t well.
Fortunately, we can rely on the modern technology. My brother continues to send photos of hers via Skype to keep me updated. It’s amazing how much she’s changed. Her skin just glows, her eyes sparkle. She looks radiant.
My absence from her life came from only one place – love. This sentiment has led me to think of my past experiences – some flashbacks of my loved ones when they couldn’t be there with me . They gave me all sorts of reasons I didn’t want to accept at those times. Now looking back, perhaps some of them if not all would’ve done it for love. That’s how I’d rather believe it anyway…
Ted Tsai 