Tag: Writing

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Five Life Lessons I’ve Learned From My Dog

The common phrase dogs are man’s best friend is probably an understatement. To me, they’re also man’s best teacher. In some circumstances, they’re even man’s life saver. Imagine a world without dogs, how sad and lonely would that be?

Of course, our furry kids don’t come for free. They have needs too. In fact, they need us more than we need them. But ironically, they understand us more than we understand them. Dogs aren’t cheap. Arguably, there’s a high cost associated with having a dog. For example, dog food, dog treats, dog medicine, dog grooming and dog health care etc. They’re all much dearer than human’s. Surprised? Money aside, dogs are also famous/infamous for being high maintenance animals. They require someone to do the clean-up, play with them and give them enough attention. It’s a lifelong commitment and a huge responsibility to bear. But in spite of all these, many dog owners never regret having a dog. Why? Because the trust and unconditional love we receive from them is unmatched by any other kinds of creatures including humans.

I’ve had my dog Jamie since he was only a 3 month old puppy. Time flies! He’s now a 12 year old senior dog. I admit sometimes I get tired of looking after him. I’m juggling and struggling with a work-life balance at the same time. I wish I had more time for myself: To rest, to read, to write, to do all those creativity projects, to go out night-clubbing and to  have a vibrant social life. But every time I spend time with my dog, by that I mean going out and about on the beach or around the bush as opposed to doing a retail therapy or having a nightlife, he has this magic power to make me see what I don’t always see – wants aren’t necessarily needs. My need to seek external validation is one of misconceptions I have about what makes me happy. He’s helped me step back and stay away from that. This fellow has changed my life completely and unreservedly… for better. He’s taught me to appreciate the moment, to live in the present I’m in. Most of all, he’s shown me love is a verb, not a noun. In that, these are 5 life lessons I’ve learned from him.

1. Chase toys, not troubles: Do we forget that sometimes life is a bit fun and games? Fair enough, we don’t always win but we don’t have to lose our sense of humour as a result. Have we taken life too seriously? If we can’t see the bright side, can we at least try to see the light side? Yes, life is hard, but instead of echoing the sentiment, can we approach it and do the opposite – laugh at it? My dog doesn’t temp fate, he deals with practicality, what’s in front of him. When life throws him a lemon, he chases it, plays with it and perhaps even chews it. If he doesn’t like it, he spits it out. He’s inspired me to be a comedian, not a complete drama queen in the life stages. You either laugh or cry, which role would you choose to play?

2. There’s a such thing as a free meal if you are good to your parent(s): My dog totally relies on me. I’m fine with it. He knows who’s boss in this household. All he has to do is be a good son. He’s enough. He doesn’t need to kiss my ass or try to be a different breed to get all freebies in the house. He’s a constant reminder that there’s always a breadwinner/boss above us, whether it’s in life or in career. No matter what position we’re in, none of us got to where we are alone. Be thankful and respectful to people who helped us along the way.

3. Forgive (and forget sometimes): This is by far the biggest lesson. Somehow I think all major wars and conflicts still happening in the world today is because we human beings haven’t learnt one thing – forgiveness. Dogs forgive. Period. They even forget sometimes. It’s not because they have a shorter memory, it’s because they know life goes on and it’s shown in their capability to move on. To me, that’s the true spirit of forgiveness. Are you (still) waiting for someone to show some remorse so that you’ll consider forgiving him? What if he never does, are you going to sit there and wait forever? Who’s really being punished here? As a matter of fact, we define what forgiveness is, not the offender or the enemy.

4. Love without an asterisk. If we want to know what love is, just go and watch how a dog shows affection to his/her owner. If we treat love like an investment, expect a bigger return later, most of us will go bankrupt very quickly. Some say Love is blind. I disagree. I think only people are too blind to see what love is. Can we love someone without terms and conditions? The fine print? Love is love, full stop.

5. Certain things aren’t for human consumption…: What the heck is this? Well, I deliberately won’t elaborate it. Use some imagination! Bring out your creativity! Give me your short and sweet answer.

So, where do we go from here? or should I say what has Jamie done today? He’s slept in his bed, daydreamed a bit, checked me out a few times, eaten dinner, gone to toilet. It’s a good life, isn’t it? Now he’s lying on the floor behind my chair as I write this. If I could just add another point to make the 6th life lesson I’ve learnt from him, it’d be Let sleeping dogs lie…

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Freedom Of Speech Leaves Some Of Us Speechless

You can never know who is on the other side reading your on-line comments.

Social media has created a giant cyber space that allows us to speak or write as freely as we like while at the same time remain anonymous if we choose to. Its raising popularity continues to threaten the longevity of traditional media like newspaper and TV. We’ve seen some media companies suffer a major blow, land in deep water and lose ground in recent years. Some reacted quickly and transformed themselves into more digital-friendly entities. Some unfortunately were too slow to respond and went out of business.

Nowadays, social media platforms are readily available at our fingertips. With a few clicks we can set one up in minutes and get the ball rolling in no time. Anyone who broadcasts or publishes their work on internet can pretty much call themselves the media. In there, the old debate over Freedom of Speech seems to have re-surfaced. The line between acceptable language and unacceptable language couldn’t be more blurred.

The old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me” isn’t child’s play. Behind a brave face, is a fragile heart we don’t always get to see. The thing is we’re all prone to negative remarks. One bad comment circulating on the face of social media, can be seen by many people, friends, family and strangers. It’s enough to ruin someone’s day. What about some fake news we’ve heard time and time again? It’s going around, spreading like wildfire everywhere in the world.

Has Freedom of Speech gone too far? Living in a democratic society, we’re entitled to exercise our rights of freedom of speech. “The deal” is we’re free to express our opinions openly but only in a non-violent way. Yet, we can take it all for granted. Some use it and abuse it. To put things in perspective, in some parts of the world, Freedom of Speech is an unattainable commodity. Their fights continue while we sleep…

To dive in to the notion of Freedom of Speech, it’s all about the freedom to make our voices heard. One way to do that is through election. If you’re an overseas reader, in case you didn’t know, voting in Australia is mandatory. By law every eligible citizen is required to cast their vote during election or they’ll face a fine. Here on the election day, outside each polling station you’ll likely see an army of supporters and an array of volunteers for their candidates. They smile at you, hand out the how-to-vote sheets and if you don’t mind stopping for a minute or two, they’ll explain to you why you should vote for their favourite politicians. Generally, I don’t classify myself as a swing voter, my mind is pretty much made up before I do the ballot papers thing.

In the state of NSW, we just finished State Election 2 weeks ago. The night before the election was held, my commuter train got delayed. As a result, I was stuck inside a compartment for over half of an hour on Friday evening. This incident left a bad taste in my mouth that I vowed not to support my sitting member for the first time. Next day, when I went to vote, just 30 minutes before it closed, I met this interesting lady outside the polling place. She was there to support an independent candidate. I asked her why she’s doing it, she said in a strong tone: We need a different voice in this community, someone who can focus on the local issues…etc. I guess I was a bit swayed by her. Anyway, when I was done with the voting, I went out and still saw her there till the end. I was impressed by her dedication. I stopped again for a chat. This time I got to know her a little better. I learned she was a flight attendant working for Qantas. The next day she was due to fly to that city in that country. I commented how lucky she’s living the jet set lifestyle. She smiled and said: After a while, the novelty does wear off… Then she rolled her eyes and lamented in a joking way: Once I land in there tomorrow, I’ll be shut off from the outside world because I won’t have access to Facebook and Google… I laughed in agreement. Right at that moment, I also realized how lucky we are to live in a free country with unrestricted access to the Web. Our Freedom of Speech is assured and given to us “free of charge”. Importantly, the same goes for respect for the rights of others.

The fact that I can write pages and pages of posts expressing my opinions without fears, I’m thankful for it. But when do we go from here? When all is said and done, sometimes we still can’t shut up the noises and bigotry out there. When respect is not being respected, when someone still pushes our buttons, remember: The power is in your hands. Stay calm and keep your grace. Just push one of these buttons back – OFF or DELETE.

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You Will Not Get The Business Unless You Ask For It

What does it take to utter those words, to say what you want? What gets in your way? Do you sometimes expect others to read your mind or reciprocate your feelings? Are you playing a waiting game or just sitting there to see what happens? Are you hoping that one day someone will discover that special gift in you and take your career or business to the next level? And? If none of your old tricks has worked, are you open to new tricks even though they may make you uncomfortable at first?

Back in the March 2014 conference, when our MD was presenting, he was talking about what he’s learnt during his time with the company which he created 2 decades ago. Out of 10 points he raised, one struck me like an electricity shock. He said it point-blank: “You will not get the business unless you ask for it”. This message was so profound that has stuck with me since. To find truth in it, I didn’t have to look too far. My sister is a classic example. The steps she took to get a promotion to the position of Financial Controller in a well-known recruitment firm, Japan, were astonishing. It wasn’t just one-shot thing but multiple attempts for 2 years to get where she is today. The hurdles she overcame, the office politics she endured, at the end she got it. Undeniably it was an amazing achievement for a foreigner, a woman and a minority living in such a homogeneous society. I can visualise the glass ceiling being smashed, leaving shards of glass all over the floor! The notion of the sky is the limit no longer applies to today’s world. It is a cliché but the only limit we have is the limits we set for ourselves.

Contrary to my sister, I’ve been this old-school guy. I prefer to work hard, earn my credit, get noticed and wait for people to promote me, one day. Yes, one day… It sounds like a good virtue but deep down it’s driven by fears. Fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of losing face. That said, in a do-or-die situation, we often become bigger than fears for the sake of survival.

During my job seeking days, those rules I had about getting ahead were thrown out the window. Why? Because I knew when stakes are high, when competition is fierce, there’s no place for humbleness. Best save all the humanity for the winner speech later. Through trial and error, I learned to adopt a self-promotion approach to get myself shortlisted way before I could even get a foot in the door.

Now back to basics. If I want people to read my mind, I need to be an open-book myself. If I want people to reciprocate my feelings, I need to let my guard down, articulate and express my feelings clearly. If I want more readership, I need to give readers ideas they can relate to or useful to them. If I want more business, I need to show up and tell them what I can offer first. Self-promotion is not about bragging about yourself or promoting your own self-interest, it’s about bringing out the best in you. It’s not a big ask, is it?

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Want To Stop Complaining Instantly? Think Big!

Complaining is part of life. We complain just about everything from traffic, money, weather, waiting in a queue, bad customer service, work, to our partner, family, sometimes even ourselves. You name it. There’re times when complaining is essential. There’re also times when complaining is a complete waste of time and energy. We know complaining can serve us well when we have a strong case and we’re looking to improve a situation. We also know complaining can produce no good results when we just want to vent. Ironically, people on the receiving end often put up with our ranting without complaining. Most of time we don’t even realize it till we see the big picture. What? The big picture? Read on and you’ll see why.

In February/March 2016, all our Sydney staff were sent to Melbourne for a 3-day conference. I was both excited and nervous as I’d never been to Melbourne. Only the night before I was due to fly, then I started to pack my personal belongings. My goal was to travel as light as possible. On the day I arrived at the airport, I was a little bit late. So, I was in a mad rush to get my check-in done. Luckily, my checked baggage was sorted within minutes thanks to the fast Self Service Check-in facilities. As I proceeded to a security screening point, I realized I had a piece of nail scissors in my carry-on baggage. Damn! I should’ve put it in my checked baggage but there was no turning back. No surprise, it was confiscated and dumped into a bin. The customs officer who caught it and threw it away, looked at me as if I was a terrorist. I wasn’t happy, but time was running out, I’d better hurry up or I’d miss my flight. A few minutes later, I saw my colleagues still standing at the gate and waiting. None of them had boarded the plane. It gave me a peace of mind. Great! It wasn’t too bad after all. Feeling hugely relived, I thought finally I can pace myself and take it easy. I went up to them to join their conversation. While there soon I found myself starting to complain about my bad experience just then. Interestingly, at that point, a colleague next to me was scrolling through pages and pages of his photo albums on the phone. I happened to see a picture of him – a shaved head with stitches around his skull. It looked like someone had cut it open with a knife or scissors then put staples back on to close it again. It was quite scary to watch. Right there and then, I stopped. I realised my complaint was nothing compared to the image I’d just seen. I felt a bit embarrassed, almost ashamed. But out of curiosity, I went to ask him what was that all about. He said he was diagnosed with a brain tumour a few years ago. Following that he underwent a brain operation to have it removed. It was a success. Then, he was treated with a chemotherapy to ensure the monster never return again. That picture of him was taken not long after the surgery was done. Who would’ve known that years later it turned out to be the big picture for me to see what really matters at the end of the day.

What if you’re the one who receives complaints? One of my friends who was in a managerial position had a smart way of handling chronic complaints from her staff. She’d listen to them patiently, then hit back with the big question like: So, what do you suggest doing to change it? This would put them in problem-solving mode as opposed to just sitting there and whinging about it.

Next time, when you catch yourself or someone complaining about something that’s clearly not worth your time and attention. You know those types of complaints – just whining and whining. Whether it’s done in person, on the phone or in social media, think big!

The big picture: Does it matter at the end of the day?

The big question: What do you suggest doing to change it?

 

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Down But Not Making You Down

Confidence, we all want it but not everyone gets it. Where does confidence come from after all? What makes one more confident than the other? Does confidence mean you need to be a loud and bossy type or appear superior in front of other people? Do you have to be a certain breed to exude a high level of confidence? If you haven’t got it, can you just fake it to make it? So many questions here but the answer might be just one only. Mel Robbins says: Confidence is a skill, not a personality trait. It is the willingness to try. Do you agree? Read the following story, it may change the way you believe what confidence is.

So, I was on the train one Friday night after work. As usual, I proceeded to the middle carriage and stood in a quiet spot. There was nothing else to do except starring at my phone and scrolling through pages and pages of Facebook feeds. This commute was no difference from any other days. But it all started to change when this 30-year-old-ish lady got on the train. She came sitting down next to two female passengers – Presumably a mother and a daughter. They had two big suitcases standing side by side against their knees. With check-in bag tags still hanging, it looked like they’d just got out of the airport or something. Right there and then, this young lady just burst out and started to ask them a few questions like where they’d traveled from etc. Up to that point, I was reading some stuff on my phone, but my attention started to drift a bit. I was drawn by the energy she brought into this confined space. It was delightful to watch her personality shine through like a social butterfly. A great deal of charisma, confidence and a good sense of humour came right out of her – she even joked about her grey hair. Surly she didn’t mind people around having a laugh about it. Soon I found myself smiling and I noticed other passengers were smiling, too. It was infectious. What can I say? She added much fun to this tedious train ride. When we got off at the next station, everyone still carried the side-effect and wore a little grin on the face. I wondered what the incoming passengers might’ve thought. Well, she made our night that’s why. What was so special about this young lady you might ask? Well, do I have to mention that she appeared to be someone who had Down syndrome? I was glad that we had someone like her in our society!

If you are a quiet person, you can be confident in a quiet way. You don’t have to change yourself to be a mouthy human being. If you are an introvert, you can be confident in an introverted way. You don’t have to change yourself to look like an extrovert or act in such a way that’s totally opposite to your true character. To me, when it comes to confidence, it’s all about confide in your identity. How so? Let’s look at the word “confident” and unpack it piece by piece. You’ll see what I mean. I’m not a linguistic expert but I love exploring words in my unique way and make it my own.

All in all, if you buy what I’m selling here which is the notion of personal experiences, then you’ll know that at the end of the day, it’s our personal experiences that form part of our identities, something that no one can ever take away from us. Knowing that it’s already within us, we can work on bringing out the best in us and the rest? Just smile or have a laugh. That comes with confidence…

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One War That’s Always Worth Fighting For

As I write this, I ask myself: How many wars are going on in the world at this moment, right now? Look what’s been dominating the news headlines everywhere – a trade war between US and China is heating up. We see both sides blowing hot and cold about their moves while trying to resolve their differences diplomatically. As to what’s going to happen next is anyone’s guess. Things may well unfold further and further but no one can say decisively who’s going to win and who’s going to lose. Meanwhile, there’re civil wars, cold wars and wars with no name happening in other parts of the globe that we probably don’t know about. Big or small, the number is countless. It’s sad but true. So, what are people fighting for or against and in the name of what? Justice? Freedom? Power? Fairness? Ideology? Religion? Retaliation? All wars bear some heavy consequences and incur human causalities whether it’s physical, mental or financial. There’s a price to pay. Even if one side comes out of it winning the war but may still end up losing the battle. No wonder they say you need to pick your battles wisely.

What do I know about war? Back in the day when I was doing International Relation as part of my Political Science major at The University of New South Wales (UNSW), I learned that war is not evitable and often the last resort to resolving conflict between countries or military groups etc. That’s what you do when all other means have been exhausted and failed to produce desired outcomes. Well, then it raises an important question: What makes going to war worth a while? Sadly, we don’t get an answer till war is over. It’s such a complicated issue that sometimes we’d better let history be the judge.

Looking at something closer to home. February, the last month of summer here in Sydney Australia. After weeks of soaring heat and high humidity, I’m really looking forward to colder months ahead. But what’s coming along isn’t so welcoming – a flu season. The flu virus comes in 3 different types A, B and C. Depending on the regions, flu can strike either in winter months or all year round. The trickiest part of the flu virus is it’s always changing. The flu vaccine available out there is by far our best defense but every year we’re only playing catch-up. Why? Next year, there’ll be a new strain coming out hence a new type of vaccine needs to be developed to tackle it. Have heard enough of the flu virus? What about the word we all dread to hear – Cancer. How many people and their families and friends have been affected by it? Stomach cancer, breast cancer, lung cancer, skin cancer etc. Aren’t they scary?! Fortunately, cancer is no longer a death sentence as long as it’s detected at an early stage and treated accordingly. That’s just a common sense. Overall, these bad guys – the flu virus, deadly bacteria and cancerous cells don’t really discriminate against your race, your religion, your identity or your status. All they care about is to find a crack in your immune system, sneak in, launch an attack on your cells and watch you falling apart.

So, the title here is: One war that’s always worth fighting for? What is it then? By now, you would’ve got a good idea. That’s right! What I’m advocating here is forget our ideological differences, drop the stupid prejudice, spend more time and energy on what matters and what will make a difference to humanity – fighting against our real common enemies – all types of flu, all types of cancer, and all the diseases that have plagued our communities, families and friends…

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The End Of A Chapter, Not The End Of The World

Do you dread changes? Who can avoid changes? Seasons change, things change, people change, businesses change. People come and people go. The truth is no two days are the same.

As our situations continue to fluctuate, it’s quite scary to think that what we have today may well run away from us tomorrow. Whether we’re the ones who call the shots or not, there’ll bound to be a time when life unfavourably turns upside down or decides to go its own separate way. Unfortunate life events like a relationship break-up, a redundancy, a health scare etc. can mess up with our mental health and affect our outlook on life. Remember when last time it happened? How did you cope with it? Did it seem like forever? Did you see it as the end of a chapter or the end of the world? How did you finally get out of it?

Personally, I’m easy to fall prey to that black-and-white thinking pattern and get myself into a position where I see no light at the end of tunnel. Does it sound all too familiar? I don’t think I’m alone in this. Looking back at my past troubles, I remember how I sat on the floor in my living room thinking if I can go on another day, another night. It’s funny now I’m speaking in the present (continuous) tense, I can be quite casual about it. Yes, I did go on another day, another night but not without struggles.

What comes to your mind when you hear the word struggle? For me, I automatically associate it with the grieving process. The grieving process sounds heavy but he isn’t a bad boy by any definition. He just needs you to honour him and give some attention to his crying out loud voice. That’s all he asks for. We know that process is unarguably painful but utterly necessary for survival and recovery even though we don’t want to admit it. The best analogy I can use is it’s like you get a severe sunburn, the aftermath is the skin is trying to shed its old layer before the new layer has a chance to grow.

Here I am writing this post to tell the world that it’s the end of a chapter, not the end of the world. I’m sure if you’ve been there and done that, then you’ll know it’s true. You’ll also agree that the grieving process is part of the package, therefore it should be respected, not be played down or ridiculed by any means. It’s OK we all do it differently in the process. Looking at people around me, a colleague of mine was made redundant last week. As soon as he was told to leave, he became quite upset and withdrawn. At the end, he chose to go quietly and that was his way of “coming to terms” with the reality. Then, another colleague of mine is in the transition of getting divorced. For months she’s handled her relationship breakup like “it’s a business as usual”, so well that none of us in the office has noticed anything unusual about her broken marriage. She’s just one of those people that doesn’t like to show vulnerability in public. Two different people, two different reactions. No big deal. As much as we’d like to help people in their grieving process, they need time and space, not words full of cliché like “life goes on” or “you’ll be fine”. They won’t be taken in seriously because it’s meaningless.

As we finish off one chapter and prepare to step into the next chapter whether it’s a new job or a new relationship, what we’ll carry over is a new set of standards or better quality control so to speak. From there, things start to look up and I’ve seen evidence of successful transformation in numerous cases among my friends and ex coworkers. As for me, one thing I’ve learned in my own grieving process is the notion of expect the unexpected. Whether there’s something pleasant or unpleasant in store, with a “no expectations” mindset, it does get easier, come what may. It’s not about lowering the standards, it’s about not being controlled by the uncontrollable.

Now this post is about to draw to a close. Yes, all posts must come to an end. I thought I’d include a photo of a beautiful sunset over Sydney Harbour taken by myself, with a narrative: The reason why people keep falling in love with sunset is because it doesn’t last… Tomorrow, there’ll be a sunrise, a new chapter. Watch this space!

Thanks for reading. Catch ya in the next post soon!

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A Message To My 11 Month Old Niece

Do you know what it’s like to live a life of privilege? There’s nothing wrong with living life on a fast lane if you go out of your way to earn it. You work hard, play hard, day in, day out, sure you deserve it 100%. Self-righteous or not, privilege isn’t necessarily a dirty word. I’m a firm believer that privilege is something we earn, not something we own. But what if privilege is given to us without us doing the work?

My niece was born on Valentine’s Day 2018. For that reason, I call her little cupid. She’s now a healthy, active 11-month-old baby girl. The first time I saw her, she was only 2-day old and still at the hospital. From that moment on, I decided that I want to be a different type of uncle. An uncle like no others. I’ll be her friend, playmate, soulmate, coach and guidance. One day when she’s old enough to learn about this wild wild world we live in, I’ll be there to tell her the stories about our family – how we came to Australia and how we flourished in The Lucky Country. Oh man, so many things I want to pass down and instill in her but the one that sticks out from all others is the idea of taking nothing for granted. It’s a good virtue for anyone to have. Don’t you think?

Look around, there’s a sense of entitlement embedded in many of us these days which we often take for granted, be it the right to vote, to marry, to speak freely or to move into a new city or a different country etc. These so called human rights we were born with or grew up with did not come of their own accord but because a group of brave women and men before us, before our times, who had fought long and hard or risked their freedom or even lives to achieve equality and justice we now enjoy and regard as the norm. Over a year ago, I was fortunate enough to be part of the history – having a say in Australian Marriage Law. I’m proud of being one of the Yes voters in the postal survey conducted by ABS (Australian Bureau of Statistics). When the results were announced, the majority of Australians were overjoyed by an overwhelming, wide spread public support for marriage equality across all states and territories. What it led to was on the 7th of December 2017, Marriage Act was officially amended to include same sex couples. Right when the motion was passed in the federal parliament, Australia went to join the ranks of the other 25 nations to become the 26th country in the world to recognise same sex marriage. On that day, my niece wasn’t even born yet. This is just one of many examples. Things like Freedom of Information Act, multiculturalism, to name just a few. My niece like other babies around her age will grow up knowing her human rights are protected by law, largely thanks to those unsung heroes for their relentless work to fight against the old, unfair laws. Some taboos that were once thought to be sensitive, untouchable or even impossible, are now a way of life. Of course, there’re still more jobs to be done in all areas where discrimination may still be present. We can change the law but we can’t change people’s attitude overnight.

My little cupid, remember, you belong to nobody but yourself. Some day you’ll work your way up to discover a unique trait in yourself like no other, that’s your gift to the world. Give as if it’s a privilege but don’t ever allow anyone to take your goodness for granted. Somehow, I realize this is a message to uncle Ted, too…

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A Reflection On My One Year Blogging Journey

I meant to write something else but as 2018 is about to come to an end, I thought I’d just “cheat” a bit by writing about a reflection on my one year blogging journey. It’s like a year end review that kind of thing. I can’t find a better way to farewell 2018 and welcome 2019 than this.

This is how I see it, when people read my blog posts, whether it’s one or many, whether they spend only five minutes on it or longer, I’m actually taking them through a part of my journey that I hold dearly. Isn’t it wonderful when readers go venturing into the material you’ve written, then decide to give you a like or even follow you? It’s a big honour. I can’t say enough about how much I appreciate it. That’s why it’s ultra important for me to produce quality writing whenever I can. One year on, it still gives me the chills and I’m still like the new kid on the block. I keep reminding myself, stay grounded, don’t take anything for granted.

What can I say? It’s been amazing and daunting at the same time. Just like a roller coaster ride, ups and downs, ups and down, some days I thought my blog posts had done good deeds and added value to readers, some other days I thought not quite there yet, there were still many holes in my writing.

All in all, I’m here for the long-run. Not to dismiss the fact that at one stage I did quit. But two weeks later, I came back and re-launched a new website as you see now. I’ve been managing my blog like a small boutique store on a quiet corner – quality over quantity. We’re all here to “sell” something. So, what do I sell? To put it boldly: I’m here to sell the concept of “personal experiences”. Do I care about the stats? Of course I do. Traffic or readership can go both ways, either encouraging or discouraging. But I try not to get too hung up by that. They say you rather have 1 quality reader than 1000 non-quality ones. That’s so true. Even if my blog posts resonate with only one quality reader, that’d still be awesome and like someone giving me a pat on the back… Very rewarding!

Juggling between a full time job and my blogging “business” along with other commitments has been a challenge. I admit blogging isn’t a top priority in my life at the moment. After all, I have a day job that I enjoy. It helps pay my bills so I need to give it my 100% when I’m there. But outside that, the creative process begins in my head everywhere I go – when I’m out and about, catching a bus, doing house chores, walking my dog, taking a lunch break or having some me time in the evening etc. By the time I sit down and write, though tired and exhausted from all other activities, I still get a pretty good vibe about what I want to share with readers. As much as I’d love to finish writing in one go, the reality is it always takes more than one session to complete one blog post. It’s also not uncommon for me to go back and refine my writing even after I’ve published it.

2019, it’s only one more day or two more sleeps to go here in the southern hemisphere. How time has flown by so quickly this year. I won’t bore you with my New Year resolution in fact I haven’t got one. But now looking at the drafts box on my website, it shows 27 (including this one) blog posts waiting to be published. A light-bulb moment! I think I see the sign. I’ll make them my 2019 New Year resolution. Happy New Year!

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Harness The Power Of Money

Money talks but does money walk? I don’t think there’s such a phrase in English but you get what I mean. We’ve seen money as a good motivator for some people. Let’s face it, when money is good, it’s hard to resist it, isn’t it? So, will you jump at an opportunity or an offer purely based on the money factor? What role does money play in your life?

A month ago, I went to a family dinner party that I was invited to by a friend whom I had just met. It was my first time to see the host family and their guests so I didn’t know what to expect. Fortunately, everyone was so welcoming and charitable, I began to mingle with them and make small talk very quickly. Among many topics, one that stood out a lot was career. I guess talking about ourselves especially what we do for a living is often deemed as a good ice breaker.

The host mother, a teacher and her teenage son, a recent high school graduate seemed to be very interested in what I had to say about my jobs, past and present. I could tell she wanted to hear my perspectives and apply to her son’s situation if any of my words was useful. I loved their curiosity. It really fired me up and made me want to share the practicality, the nuts and bolts of how I landed my jobs. For me, reviewing my career trajectory, all the ups and downs I went through and mistakes I made along the way, serves as a good reminder of how I got where I am today. It’s like taking a refresher course again. When I looked back on it, what I learned most was money was a wrong reason for leaving a current job or accepting a new job. Why? At one point, I went to take a job that looked more money and a nicer title on the outside but a few months down the track I discovered it didn’t bring me more fulfillment or happiness. In fact, I ended up working longer hours and even some weekends. Interestingly, when I saw it from an hourly rate point of view, I began to realize I wasn’t at all better off compared to the job I had before.

What do we get when we break things down into hourly rate pieces? Try this analogy: When walking through the aisles of major supermarkets here in Australia or perhaps your country too, you’ll see unit prices on almost all grocery items you come across. A unit price is a piece of information that tells shoppers exactly what they pay for per unit such as per item or per kilo. In turn, it helps shoppers see the real value of the goods they’re buying. An hourly rate works in the same way. I’m convinced that knowing how much we’re charged or paid for every hour worked, it’ll help us:

  • Rethink if the task at hand is worth paying attention to
  • Use our time more wisely and selectively when it comes to work-life balance
  • Say No more often to time-wasters (imagine how much it’ll cost us if we waste an hour on this)
  • Walk away from situations that no longer serve us

For what it’s worth, money is like a coin that has two sides, each with a distinctive character on its own. Together, money has the power to make or break our career, relationships and many more. Do you let money limit you or stretch you? To show who’s boss and make money work for you, why not start off by “charging” an hourly rate and see if money pay dividends in no time…