The Change We Don’t Want To Keep

Climate change. Who cares? I know Greta Thunberg does. Who is she? The 16 year old Swedish school girl, a climate activist, a Ted Talks speaker, now a nominees for The Nobel Peace Prize 2019, made world headlines for her “school strike for climate” protest. Started out as one person herself in August 2018, it’s since attracted more than a million of students around the globe to do just that. How could the power of one grow to a gigantic size and become a world phenomenon in such a short space of time?

Not surprisingly, the news coverage and social media all played a part. They helped spread her word but did people buy it? It’s interesting to see how the event unfolded. In the very beginning, she was literally an unknown teenager. When she first learned about climate change, she was appalled by a lack of action from the government. Her frustration got to the point where she decided to skip classes and stand outside the Swedish Parliament protesting. On day one, she was there alone with the sign saying “Skolstrejk för klimatet”. The next day, more people noticed her and started to join in. Her movement captured the worldwide attention. Teens from over a hundred countries were so inspired by her, they went following in her footsteps. In that, we’ve seen groups of young students around the globe carry the same message demanding their government to act against climate change.

What does this tell us? To be honest, at first, I thought she was just a kid hating school. Protesting was a convenient excuse for not turning up classes. Am I the only person thought that way? Surely not. But my wrong assumption of her highly publicized motive quickly dissipated as I learned more about her. I began to see her larger than life character in 2 ways.

  • She turned her belief in “doing the right thing” for our planet into action even it meant going on her own.
  • She’s the epitome of the power of one.

What about you? What quality have you got in you that can make people want to stop and listen to you or follow you? If you’ve got what it takes, bring it out! Risk it! We can all start small, can’t we? We can all start alone, can’t we? Are you willing to embark on a solo journey, be an unsung hero in your own right, even when no one knows you exist?

When it comes to the environment, everyone can do something about it no matter how insignificant it may sound. My recent experiences related to this subject were a mixed bag. A few months ago while I was bush walking with my dog in a local reserve, I happened to see something annoying – a big re-usable plastic bag dumped on the shore. Because it was right near where my favourite spot was, I took it very personally. Seeing the area being littered like this, my immediate reaction was: Who’s the bastard? I kept mumbling why would anyone do such a thing to trash our environment. It bothered me so much that I decided to walk all the way back and put it in the nearest bin roughly some 800 metres away, not to mention I had to put up with the bad smell/rotten seafood coming out of the bag. Two weeks later, when I returned, I saw an envio bag hanging up on a tree with a few words written in block letters “IF YOU CARE PLEASE TAKE A BAG HELP CLEAN UP THANK YOU” (pictured). This time I was moved by it. Someone out there who was also caring and smart enough to know that if one day our Earth is too sick to survive, we’re all going to suffer. No amount of success or money can compensate for it. Agree?

Finally, before this post draws to a close, I thought I’d mention the common real estate mantra location location location. We say it repeatedly to highlight the importance of the location and how it can dictate the value of a home. But the location itself only reveals half of the truth. It’s the environment that makes or breaks business at the end. If the environment can shape who we are as a person, it certainly has the same capability to determine our destiny. The good news is it’s in our hands. The bad news is it’s also in our hands…

The Night My Home Got Burgled

In 1990 my family came to Australia as business migrants. It wasn’t a great year to embark on a new life when the country was going through the recession. The downturn in the economy was so widespread that you could feel the doom and gloom right across the continent just about everywhere. A famous line often heard on the news was: When Japan sneezes, Australia catches a cold. A sentiment was shared by many. The fragility of the economy affected all facets of the society and put pressure on all things that required money to run. The interest rates were so skyrocket high like 15 to 17 percent that if you had enough funds in your bank account, you could literally live a comfortable life just from the interest earned. The problem was Australians weren’t famous for saving money. In fact, they were short of it – the cash. Facing the bleak economic outlook, at one point I was dubious about my future here long term. But because we’d already come this far, going back home wasn’t not even an option, so we held on.

If you’ve ever studied, worked or lived aboard, then you’d know what it takes to assimilate and fit into a new country. There’re so many stories I’d love to share with my readers on this platform, but I cannot possibly include them all in one post so for now I’m just going to focus on one odd event. Yes, you heard it right. Odd. It took place roughly about 3 months after we arrived in Sydney. I call it: The Night My Home Got Burgled.

Before I start, just to give you a rough idea about the place we were renting then. It was a 2-bed old style flat that came as unfurnished. When we moved in, the condition was basic. Our plan was to buy a permanent home to live in before the 6-month lease was due. Therefore, we weren’t in any hurry to stock the place with new furniture except daily essentials like fridge, washing machine, TV and beds stuff etc.

So, on that day before the event unfolded, we did something new – playing the tennis for the first time. It looked easy but honestly hitting the ball over the net was much harder than I’d thought. Later that day, my muscles already started to ache from the hours of workout on the court. At night, we all got very tired and exhausted and just wanted to go to bed early. There was nothing out of ordinary except for some silly reason, my mum went to kitchen and left the sliding window half open for the entire evening.

I felt asleep very quickly but got up to go to toilet in the middle of the night. On my way I noticed something spooky – a shadow across the living room. It was too dark to pin down exactly what it was or could’ve been. So, I gave up. While there, I also noticed the street lights reflected off our kitchen floor while the curtains were blowing in the wind. I thought who the hell has forgotten to lock the window. Anyway, I was too sleepy to figure it all out, I went back to bed again.

The next morning when I woke up. My dad came talking to me, in his usual serious tone, he said: We’ve been broken into! “No way!”, I retorted. But we were all at home last night. How could it happen? Still in disbelief, I stormed into my bed room, then realized some of my personal belongings were gone. My watch, my backpack, my wallet. “The burglar only took my stuff. Why?!” I yelled and protested. What about my passport? I’d be in trouble if it was gone too. Luckily, I took it out of my backpack and placed it on the coffee table that night. My sixth sense told me to do that. It proved to be a wise move.

Minutes later, my mum came joining us, she said to me in somewhat a humorous way: your pants that I hung out and let dry in the balcony yesterday are now all over the floor. Apparently, the burglar even tried on my pants. Back in the day I was the thinnest I’d ever been, waist size 27”. There was no way he could’ve fit himself into that pair of chinos! Not a chance.

This unfortunate event left me with a bad taste in the mouth about Australia. But really it had nothing to do with Australia. A burglary can happen anywhere anytime. I soon moved on and carried on living my life.

Strangely, a month later, an unexpected twist to the event started to surface. One day a librarian from my college called. She said someone found my backpack in the library. I should go and pick it up. At first, I was a little puzzled. I said: Are you sure it’s my backpack? It can’t be right. My backpack was stolen from my home a month ago. She was adamant that it was mine. “Yes, it’s got your college enrollment form in it. That’s how I got your contact details”. I was stunned. She was correct. The following day I went to the library to collect my backpack. Of course, it was empty. All other things never returned. Up till now, I still have no idea how my backpack ended up in the college library, some 20-minute drive away from us.

Looking back, what I found disturbing and gave me the creeps was it happened right when we were all inside. I was grateful for the fact that no one was harmed during the burglary and the intruder left us alone. Those goods stolen from me were just material things. Overtime, they would’ve lost their values and become unwanted pieces. The aftermath? There was no aftermath. It failed to shatter our Aussie dreams. Not a day in my life I was thinking about this bad experience except now when I’m writing this post. Like the Australian economy, it survived the storm and bounced back. We also succeeded in our pursuit in our own right.

Life goes on. If the burglar was someone in his 20’s then, by now he would be in his late 40’s or 50’s. If he’s still alive today and I hope he is, he would be someone’s partner, father or uncle. I sincerely wish he’s already a changed man and is out there doing good deeds for the people and the country…

Want To Stop Complaining Instantly? Think Big!

Complaining is part of life. We complain just about everything from traffic, money, weather, waiting in a queue, bad customer service, work, to our partner, family, sometimes even ourselves. You name it.

There’re times when complaining is essential. There’re also times when complaining is a complete waste of time and energy. We know complaining can serve us well when we have a strong case and we’re looking to improve a situation. We also know complaining can produce no good results when we just want to vent. Ironically, people on the receiving end often put up with our ranting without complaining. Most of time we don’t even realize it till we see the big picture. What? The big picture? Read on and you’ll see why.

In February/March 2016, all our Sydney staff were sent to Melbourne for a 3-day conference. I was both excited and nervous as I’d never been to Melbourne. Only the night before I was due to fly, then I started to pack my personal belongings. My goal was to travel as light as possible. On the day I arrived at the airport, I was a little bit late. So, I was in a mad rush to get my check-in done. Luckily, my checked baggage was sorted within minutes thanks to the fast Self Service Check-in facilities. As I proceeded to a security screening point, I realized I had a piece of nail scissors in my carry-on baggage. Damn! I should’ve put it in my checked baggage but there was no turning back. No surprise, it was confiscated and dumped into a bin. The customs officer who caught it and threw it away, looked at me as if I was a terrorist. I wasn’t happy, but time was running out, I’d better hurry up or I’d miss my flight.

A few minutes later, I saw my colleagues still standing at the gate and waiting. None of them had boarded the plane. It gave me a peace of mind. Great! It wasn’t too bad after all. Feeling hugely relived, I thought finally I can pace myself and take it easy. I went up to them to join their conversation. While there soon I found myself starting to complain about my bad experience just then. Interestingly, at that point, a colleague next to me was scrolling through pages and pages of his photo albums on the phone. I happened to see a picture of him – a shaved head with stitches around his skull. It looked like someone had cut it open with a knife or scissors then put staples back on to close it again. It was quite scary to watch. Right there and then, I stopped. I realised my complaint was nothing compared to the image I’d just seen. I felt a bit embarrassed, almost ashamed. But out of curiosity, I went to ask him what was that all about. He said he was diagnosed with a brain tumour a few years ago. Following that he underwent a brain operation to have it removed. It was a success. Then, he was treated with a chemotherapy to ensure the monster never return again. That picture of him was taken not long after the surgery was done. Who would’ve known that years later it turned out to be the big picture for me to see what really matters at the end of the day.

What if you’re the one who receives complaints? One of my friends who was in a managerial position had a smart way of handling chronic complaints from her staff. She’d listen to them patiently, then hit back with the big question like: So, what do you suggest doing to change it? This would put them in problem-solving mode as opposed to just sitting there and whinging about it.

Next time, when you catch yourself or someone complaining about something that’s clearly not worth your time and attention. You know those types of complaints – just whining and whining. Whether it’s done in person, on the phone or in social media, think big!

The big picture: Does it matter at the end of the day?

The big question: What do you suggest doing to change it?

 

Down But Not Making You Down

Confidence, we all want it but not everyone gets it.

Where does confidence come from after all? What makes one more confident than the other? Does confidence mean you need to be a loud and bossy type or appear superior in front of other people? Do you have to be a certain breed to exude a high level of confidence? If you haven’t got it, can you just fake it to make it? So many questions here but the answer might be just one only. Mel Robbins says: Confidence is a skill, not a personality trait. It is the willingness to try. Do you agree? Read the following story, it may change the way you believe what confidence is.

So, I was on the train one Friday night after work. As usual, I proceeded to the middle carriage and stood in a quiet spot. There was nothing else to do except starring at my phone and scrolling through pages and pages of Facebook feeds. This commute was no difference from any other days. But it all started to change when this 30-year-old-ish lady got on the train. She came sitting down next to two female passengers – Presumably a mother and a daughter. They had two big suitcases standing side by side against their knees. With check-in bag tags still hanging, it looked like they’d just got out of the airport or something. Right there and then, this young lady just burst out and started to ask them a few questions like where they’d travelled from etc. Up to that point, I was reading some stuff on my phone, but my attention started to drift a bit. I was drawn by the energy she brought into this confined space. It was delightful to watch her personality shine through like a social butterfly. A great deal of charisma, confidence and a good sense of humour came right out of hershe even joked about her grey hair. Surly she didn’t mind people around having a laugh about it. Soon I found myself smiling and I noticed other passengers were smiling, too. It was infectious. What can I say? She added much fun to this tedious train ride. When we got off at the next station, everyone still carried the side-effect and wore a little grin on the face. I wondered what the incoming passengers might’ve thought. Well, she made our night that’s why. What was so special about this young lady you might ask? Well, do I have to mention that she appeared to be someone who had Down syndrome? I was glad that we had someone like her in our society!

If you are a quiet person, you can be confident in a quiet way. You don’t have to change yourself to be a mouthy human being. If you are an introvert, you can be confident in an introverted way. You don’t have to change yourself to look like an extrovert or act in such a way that’s totally opposite to your true character. To me, when it comes to confidence, it’s all about confide in your identity. How so? Let’s look at the word “confident” and unpack it piece by piece. You’ll see what I mean. I’m not a linguistic expert but I love exploring words in my unique way and make it my own.

All in all, if you buy what I’m selling here which is the idea of personal experiences, then you’ll know that at the end of the day, it’s our personal experiences that form part of our identities, something that no one can ever take away from us. Knowing that it’s already within us, we can work on bringing out the best in us and the rest? Just smile or have a laugh. That comes with confidence…

Are Rules To Be Followed Or Broken?

Are you someone who does almost everything by the book? Is there a rulebook in your life that you’ve been following but never questioned if it’s still serving you? Is that rulebook written by yourself or someone else? Do you believe in rules are to be followed or broken? 

The world-famous Taiwanese sculptor Ju Ming once said in one of rare TV interviews a few years back: If you look around nature, things come in all shapes and sizes, but nothing in perfectly square. It was such a profound statement. I literally sat in front of my laptop re-playing it in my head and trying to digest every word that came out of it. So powerful that it’s stuck with me ever since. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. I guess I can call it a light bulb moment. In case you don’t know who Ju Ming is, of course you can Google him and find more information about his life on Wikipedia or his website. The reason why I reference him here is because it gives me a good starting point to argue that rules aren’t born out of nature, they are predominately man-made, crafted and created by individuals for specific purposes – like law and order.

Of course in our society, there’re regulations to be obeyed to, protocol to be followed though. No exceptions. All people are expected to be law-abiding citizens in all circumstances or they’ll face the consequences. Anything that is still unfair, unjust, unequal, it takes laws to change laws. We know the process can take years and in many cases, failures, setbacks, frustrations are not uncommon. It can be a whole new set of topic to discuss but for now, to a much smaller scale, I want to talk about what do we do about those rules in our personal lives. Are they helpful? Are they stretching you or limiting you? Ju Ming said, as a beginner you can acquire as many skills as you like when you’re learning. But in a creation process, you need to unlearn, stop thinking, throw away all the things you’ve been taught by others, do nothing but simply executing the work.

Researching on the topic has been a rewarding experience for me. I’m absolutely captivated by Jun Ming’s artworks and his philosophy of life. Even though you don’t consider yourself as an arty type of person, will find his artworks full of life and engaging to watch. I first heard of him when I was only a child but who would’ve thought two to three decades later I’d write a post inspired by him. So, back to the question of: Are rules to be followed or broken? Before I started to write this post, I thought I had a “right” answer based on my own presumption but after I’ve done more study of this subject, I’m going to surprise myself and say: I think it’s both.

If you’re an artist or someone who wants to pursue a mastery in your field, rules are to be followed when you first learn the basic techniques. Over time they will help you lay a solid foundation before you take your skillset to the next level. As you progress, rules are to be bent so they adapt to your unique personal style unlike and unmatched by others. Finally, when you execute your work, rules are to be broken or let go, so you aren’t bound by any preset concepts, thoughts or ideas, that’s when you produce something, a masterpiece truly your own. Sounds like an art? I think it is…

Be Visible To Sell Yourself

Intentionally or not, we all sell ourselves at some point in our lives. Whether it’s in a boardroom presenting our ideas to a group of executives or sitting in a meeting room being interviewed by a panel of hiring managers for a new job you really want or having an annual performance appraisal or bonus review with your boss, it’s inevitable we need to take the role of the salesperson and showcase what we’re good at. Ultimately, the goal is to persuade a decision maker to buy what we’re selling – ourselves.

Where do we begin? A good place to start is to ask ourselves this question: Are we visible enough to be counted for? I guess not everyone is comfortable with self-promoting or putting themselves forward but when the stakes are high, no one can afford to take a back seat or hide in a corner waiting to be discovered. The good news is: The world seems to have its own rewarding system. The bad news is: It rightfully operates outside our comfort zone.

Here’s an interesting example. The other day I was chatting with a café owner downstairs from the same building where I work, I noticed he had a box of friands (small almond cakes), uncovered, sitting on top of a food display cabinet instead of inside like the rest of patisseries. Not that he ran out of space. I was very curious so I went to ask him what it was all about. Wouldn’t they go stale very soon? I asked. He was very quick to respond: because they sell fast this way. I immediately got it. Yes, he had his point. Those friands looked fabulously delicious and mouth-watering. They were right in a prime position beside a cash register counter, perfectly on the eye level for any discerning customers. Who wouldn’t be tempted to grab a piece or two while there? Understanding the psychology behind it and marketing it in such a fashion, the café owner was indeed very clever at playing with visual effects which can work wonderfully like a hook that captures the consumer mind. It’s a lure that attracts buyers attention. The rest? It is a matter of letting the product speaking for itself: Hey! Look at me, I’m hot, I’m the best seller, buy me and eat me, now.

Although visibility doesn’t guarantee success, essentially, it’s a key ingredient to getting your foot in the door. Next time when you have an opportunity to sell yourself, how would you like to position yourself to increase your visibility? Think of those yummy friands. FYI, they were sold out…

Broken Into But Not Broken

Gone are the days when burglars would smash a window or break a door to get into a house and take away people’s precious belongings. Nowadays, crimes in this nature are committed in cyberspace without even leaving a trace in the physical world. Cybercrime has become so sophisticated that cybercriminals like hackers can literally steal your hard-earned money or valuable personal data without showing up on your doorstep. They can just sit quietly behind a desk, tap away at a computer and watch your every move in secret. One click is all it takes for them to gain access to your network. The next thing you know, your security is in tatters and your privacy is in the hands of the wrong people.

The truth is no one is 100% immune from being a target for cybercriminals. As a blogger or a social media account user like Facebook, when you put yourself out there, the information posted online or shared in public can be collected and studied by cybercriminals. Their premeditated attacks are aimed at stealing your money and/or identity. The stakes are so high that we cannot afford to take chances and only deal with it when it happens.

The reason for writing this post is to educate and remind readers about the dangers of hacking and serious damage hackers can do to you once they gain an unlawful entry to your computer devices. Why do I care so much about this issue? Because it happened to me a couple of years ago. Knowing how bad it was, I don’t wish anyone to go through a similar experience like mine. So, how it started is one day I received an unsolicited email that looked seemingly legitimate. Although I remained a bit guarded and skeptical about it at first, I was fooled to click the malicious link that gave a hacker an indefinite remote access to the computer I was using. The following few days I began to notice something fishy was going on particularly when I was doing some online transactions. For example, my mouse wasn’t moving as freely as usual. By the time I reported this incident, damage had already been done. The length I had to go through to clean up the computer and repair the disease infected by hacking was astonishing. Because it was so badly damaged, at the end I had no choice but to give up the computer altogether.

What I learnt from this experience is:

  1. Hackers don’t just contact you out of blue, they do their homework and study your online behavioral patterns way before they send you an invitation.
  2. Hackers will lure you with a bait and ask you to click a link to view more details. That’s a red flag.

We live in the digital age that there’s a tone of information coming to us from all different corners of the world at any give time. It’s natural that we don’t want to miss out on anything important or valuable. But not everything is as pure and innocent as they claim themselves to be. As we conduct more and more businesses on line and share our personal lives unreservedly in cyberspace, cybercriminals will always look for opportunities to launch their attacks. Make sure we exercise caution and stay vigilant. If need be, press “Delete” button first before hackers have a chance to press your buttons…

 

Hello Smartphone, I’m The Boss

“Your fly is undone” – Finally I plucked up the courage to tell a fellow passenger standing next to me on the bus this morning. He, like most commuters in this city, had headphones on and was reading stuff on his smartphone. So where should I start? Seeing an intent look on his face, my initial thought was to leave him alone. Part of me though wanted to speak out and save his awkward moment. After weighing it up in my head, I decided to tell him like it is. Instead of saying it verbally, I managed to type down these few words on my smartphone and show the text message in his face. Luckily, my well meaning gentle gesture was subtle enough not to cause a scene on this crowded bus.

Well, it was just a spur of the moment decision. Where did it all stem from? It could’ve been genetically ingrained in my DNA a long while ago – when I see something, I have the urge to say something. It’s just me. Anyway, my surprised move was well-received, he smiled at me and said: “Thank You”, before he had a chance to put his hand down there and zipped it up in a flash.

Speaking of smartphones, a long list of uses can go as far as our imagination takes us to. In the above case, it helped me communicate effectively and discreetly with a stranger, without even speaking a word. However, other smartphone uses, if not watched carefully, can intensify and spiral out of control. They can steal our attention away from things around us. In some serious cases, they can even have accident-prone effects on our health and safety. Arguably, using a smartphone while walking whether it’s day or night and in any given situation is just not a smart thing to do. You can never know what’s around the corner when you aren’t aware of what’s in front of you or beside you. For example, it happened to me some weeks ago when I was scrolling through my smartphone while walking on a sidewalk at night, thinking I was safe on a footpath, not realizing a car from a road was steering towards me, trying to enter a garage right where I was standing – in the middle of the driveway. One big lesson learned and never again.

Smartphones obviously have revolutionized the way we communicate with each other today and how we receive, send and share information. The trend is not going to stop. The challenge for us is to be selective – choose what feeds into our brains and only look out for things that add values to our lives. But no matter how smart, useful and attractive our smartphones are, we need to show to these small devices that we’re the boss. Remember, there’s an I in iPhone and I comes before phone…

A Thick Skin Starts With A Brave Face

It’s funny we often use the word “thick” to describe someone’s lack of intelligence or common sense in their ways of thinking, talking or behaving. Interestingly, when it comes to the skin – the largest organ in the human body, we refer “thick-skinned” to people who aren’t easily hurt, offended or embarrassed by criticism or people’s negative comments. The word “thick” in this context, isn’t too bad at all. Judging by its whole meaning, we can all agree on the positive connotations that come with it. Obviously, we’d rather be thick in the skin than in the head, wouldn’t we?

I wasn’t born with a thick skin. Throughout my life I often consider myself as a thin-skinned, introverted person. Wearing this inward label every day, has it been serving me well up to this point? The answer is I wish I could’ve been more thick-skinned in many cases. If you’re sick of sitting on the sidelines, perhaps it’s time to think about cultivating a thick skin mentality and incorporating it into your personality? Wouldn’t it be nice if we can call upon it only when a situation is required, other times we just relax and stay the way we are? The question is always the same. When facing a new challenge, the first thing that pops up is: Where should I start? What’s the first step I should be taking before I can hone the skill? What should I do to increase the chances of success? I don’t know if there’s a rule book I can follow but instead of searching far and wide, going above and beyond, a better place to start is where we’re right now. Read on and find out where I started.

A couple of weeks ago my CEO called me to his office. It turned out he wanted me take on an office project – refurbishing part of the workplace. He was very specific about what he wanted it to look like. My task was simply to find someone who can do just that. Because I already had a couple of contacts on file who specialized in this type of thing, I was very confident from the outset that I’d achieve a good outcome. Interestingly, right before I stepped out of his office, he looked at me with a grin on his face then left an unexpected remark – go out and spend the money! I wasn’t 100% sure if he was serious but I wasn’t going to treat it like a joke.

While I wasn’t given a budget to run this project, I was very careful about where the money would go. In other words, I didn’t want to spend it like there’s no tomorrow. Over a course of a week, the consultant came back to me with a quote that seemed a bit too dear. When I presented it to my CEO, he looked at it and approved it straight away. I thought, Gee that was fast. There was no point for me to stand there and argue with him. I was happy to leave it at that. But, part of me still believed there was a room for price negotiation. So, did I do anything about it?

It was a venture completely outside my comfort zone. A day after the quote was approved by my CEO, I turned around, put on a brave face and called the consultant. I could feel I was mumbling and my voice was shaky. My message was kind of subtle and blurry but he totally got it – I wanted to get the price down. He asked me how much. I paused, refused to give away my bottom line. Before I hung up, he knew it was a matter of “the ball is in his court”. A few hours later, he came back to me with a revised quote – way better than I expected, a total saving of AUD $600.00. I cheered inside. That’s enough to buy our team a plenty of pizzas. Thick crust or thin crust you may ask? I don’t care…