Like many of you, I’m home a lot these days.
As an OCD person, housekeeping helps me stay in control of my anxiety. But I also need to remind myself – Don’t go overboard. I remember my shrink said to me: It’s good to be organised but if the ritual becomes a pest, it can be problematic.
Anyway…
Here in the southern hemisphere, another gorgeous day today in Sydney. So lucky, we’ve been blessed with many beautiful sunny days this autumn. I love the fresh smell of sun dried clothes. No artificial fragrance can beat the power of natural sunlight. It’s free and environmentally friendly, too.
After my dog’s passing 2 months ago, I still keep all his stuff in the house. Everything is “business as usual”. For example, his food is still in the cupboard, his toys are still in the basket. As for his bed, I now place it on my bed instead of the floor. It gives me a great sense of belonging and comfort. At night when I go to sleep, I feel as if he’s very closed to me.
The other day I was sorting my dog’s toys before washing them. Most of them were in a good condition except for his favourite one which had lots of wear and tear. Now he’s gone, everything he had touched holds a sentimental value me. By no means I’d throw it away.
Then, there was one new toy he’d never wanted to play with. I thought: What’s the point of keeping it? So on the spur of the moment, I decided to give it away to charity.
Life goes on. For me, it means there’s something to hold on to, there’s something to let go of.
Yes my dog’s gone but only physically. In many ways he’s very much present in my life. As I’ve been on this spiritual journey, taking a more philosophical approach to life’s ups and downs and unexpected events, I realized, I’m not alone. I’ll carry him with me to the next stage of life wherever it may take us…
Life, to be continued…
Ted Tsai 