Too Many Questions And No Answers

A few days ago I went to create a new page titled “Header Image” on this blog of mine. Underneath that I inserted some narratives to describe where the photo was taken and those beautiful features around it. I felt like I had something more to say about it. So for this post, it’s an extension of that page…

If you’ve been here before, you’d agree that the view here is simply spectacular. I love being here, so does my dog. When we come up here on a sunny day, I tend to settle into my spot – a comfortable shady area away from direct sun but still exposed enough to see what’s going on. I often sit or lie down with my arms and legs stretched as far as I can then just watch the day go by. Being in a zone like this, I normally just close my eyes and try to meditate. It’s never ceased to amaze me just how slowly time can go by when I take a moment to quieten down. Of course, it’s not all calm and peaceful. Within minutes, many unwanted thoughts can pop up and even smallest noises from everywhere can shift my attention away. This has always been a challenge for me. But my philosophy here is I don’t need to be a meditation master. Just happy to be a doer.

How the story goes is in the last several months when I was in this place, I did what I used to doing – looking intently into the horizon, where the sky and the ocean met, then in a non-religious sense, asking nature a whole range of questions about things that weren’t particularly going well in my life or some fears or anxiety I was experiencing, in the hope of getting some clue or hint in return. Time after time, as it turned out, my efforts seemed in vain. It felt like I was just barking up the wrong tree in all attempts. With no exception, to say conclusively, it was a case of too many questions, too many why’s and no answers. Bearing with this, my frustration started to grow and my patience began to run out. I couldn’t help but question power of nature and wonder what’s the point of it anyway.

So. I stopped asking… then one day I came to realization that all those times I wondered why I never got a response, nature had done its part to inspire and give me all the answers but I hadn’t been listening.

What was it then? Silence…